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On Friday Mrs. Philip Arthur George Charles
Saxe-Coburg-Gotha-Schleswig-Holstein-Sonderburg-Glucksburg,
aka Camilla Parker-Bowles, is coming to Lewes to officially
open a gate into Anne of Cleves garden. ‘A Right Royal
Welcome!’ boomed the Sussex Express, sycophantically,
on Friday, while offering the caveat ‘but some of Lewes’
Republicans will refuse to kowtow to the monarchy.’
It seemed like a headline from the thirties. Viva Lewes is
of a Republican bent, proud of the heritage of Rights of Man
author Tom Paine. But we want it to be made clear that by
not going to see Camilla Parker Bowles sashaying in and out
of Southover High Street, we will not be ‘refusing to
kowtow to the monarchy’. We will just not be interested
enough to turn up. We are much more interested in some of
the other stuff put on in and around town by people with genuine
talent. We are fascinated that the Star Gallery, by exhibiting
Clint Langley’s computer-generated comic-strip images
(see cover), is raising interesting questions about the nature
of art. We are thrilled that Patti Smith, pop icon, poet,
painter and photographer is coming to Charleston for a mini-Meltdown
gig. We would like to welcome to the area writers like Melissa
Banks, Peter Carey, Christopher Ondaatje and Peter James;
jazz star Ken Peplowski; actors Henry Goodman and David Haig,
and poet laureate Andrew Motion. Perhaps Mr. Motion, the spiky
laureate, could write a poem about a royal visit to a republican
town while he’s here. And perhaps he could remind Ms
Saxe-Coburg-Gotha-Schleswig-Holstein-Sonderburg-Glucksburg,
after she has officially opened the gate, that she might close
it behind her again. Enjoy the week.

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